History

Soldier Boy

Edward Francis Teague was born on May 18, 1962, to James and Vanessa Teague. The Teagues were one of Lakewood’s oldest families, with a presence in the town going back 100 years. Ed came from a succession of war heroes: the firstborn sons of the Teague line had seen combat in every major American conflict dating to the Spanish-American War.

Ed’s father, James, served in Vietnam, and only saw Ed briefly between tours. He was killed in action in 1970, when Ed was 8. His hazy memories of his father made an impression on the young Ed, who decided he would be a soldier too.

In school, Ed was hardly the picture of a warrior. Bookish and slight of build, he was a target of ridicule and bullying that only worsened as he entered the awkward years of adolescence. In his senior year at George Washington High, Ed’s fortunes seemed to change. He’d suddenly attracted the attentions of Alice Tate, the most popular girl in the Class of 1980. Ed could hardly believe his luck and, indeed, it was not to last for long.

Following a quarrel at the senior prom, Alice sicced the school football team on her boyfriend. Ed was beaten and trussed up, hung from the goalposts at the football field, where he was left overnight. His injuries were such that he had to miss graduation. The experience was deeply humiliating, and forged a lasting enmity with Alice.

In college, Ed studied history, with the intention of becoming a teacher. During this time, he began dating Laura Copeland, a spunky redhead who’d been one of Alice’s best friends at GW High. Laura’s fiery personality complemented Ed’s taciturnity and they were married in 1985, about a year after Ed graduated.

Shortly after, Ed enlisted with the Marines. The grueling training regimen meant he was separated from his new wife, and his infant daughter Anne, for long stretches.

Over There

Teague deployed in the 2nd Recon Battalion during the 1990 Gulf War.¹ He saw combat and was later decorated for his heroism, though the details of his service are patchy; he has never gone into great detail about his experiences, not even with his children.

He returned to Lakewood in 1991 and found the home he’d left behind in shambles. While he’d been away, Laura had suffered a mental break and become violent, her outbursts even targeting five-year-old Anne. Ed filed for divorce, citing Laura’s instability. He obtained full custody and was estranged from his first wife thereafter.

Ed tried his best as a single father, attempting to adjust to a normal suburban life. He taught History at GW High, becoming a fixture of the school whose halls he’d once walked with his head down and his tail between his legs. Raising Anne alone was a challenge, however: the little girl had inherited all of her mother’s spirit and, trained as he was in the ways of war, the nuances of fatherhood eluded him.

Ed remarried in 1993. Olivia Collins was the librarian at GW High, and they got to know each other through their work. Theirs was a mature, grown-up sort of chemistry, with ample feeling if insufficient romance. Their first daughter, Sarah, was born within a year of their marriage. Their second, Jamie, came about two years later. The marriage didn’t long after that.

The Teague

As a teacher, Teague carried his soldierly bearing into the classroom, and was known for his naturally intimidating manner. Despite this, he was also known for a surprising sensitivity, and was attuned to the littlest dramas percolating between his students. He was aware, for example, of the cruelties inflicted on Brandon James, a former homeschool who endured abuse from his more popular classmates for his social inadequacies, and his unfortunate appearance, caused by birth defects.

Despite this, Teague was unable to stop Brandon’s violent rampage on Halloween night 1994, which ended with five of Brandon’s bullies killed, and Brandon himself shot and presumed dead, his body unrecovered. Though he never admitted it openly, Teague’s failure to act haunted him ever after, and his ensuing darkened moods contributed to some extent in the dissolution of his marriage to Olivia.

By the turn of the millennium, Teague divided himself exclusively between work and his daughters, though arguably, it was GW High that got the greater share of his attention. Anne graduated high school in 2004 and shocked her father by becoming a nun, entering the Religious Order of the White Flower…the same convent now run by Alice Tate, now Sister Alice-Marie. Anne’s motivations remained a mystery to Teague, and they didn’t talk much about it.

Teague accepted the principalship of GW High in 2005, to the frustration of colleague Theodora Kellerman, a Chicago transplant who’d been teaching Biology since 2000 and had been jockeying for an administrative role. Certainly, the uber-professional Theodora was naturally suited to a variety of administrative responsibilities Teague quickly found he had no time or patience for. He hired her as Vice Principal two years later, and the two developed a professional rapport that, for the most part, benefited them both.

Under Fire

On October 18, 2015, murder returned to Lakewood. Two freshmen, Stacy Winters and Brock Carmichael, were brutally murdered outside Stacy’s home. Stacy’s parents, Robert and Gina, were found dead in suspicious circumstances the same night. The tragedy sent shockwaves through the town, with attention concentrating, predictably, on the dead teenagers’ school.

Teague had to contend with a heightened police presence around the school. Not keen to surrender his school lying down, Teague grilled Deputy Richard Steele, a former student and a fellow veteran, but Richard, true to his training, wasn’t keen to divulge the sheriff’s department’s motives. Teague respected that and summoned Sheriff Hudson himself to his office.

Clark admitted official suspicion that the killer may be found among the GW High student body. He admitted he was waiting on a warrant to search student lockers. Teague argued he couldn’t unilateral search every locker in the school without cause: the students were entitled to their privacy. Clark was welcome to name a person of interest to search but, failing that, Teague was determined to fight him.²

Before leaving, Clark did Teague the courtesy of showing him something alarming he and his men had uncovered: a YouTube video, posted last night, that Brock had commented on shortly before his death. The video depicted Audrey Jensen, daughter of Teague’s best friend Howard, making out with an unknown girl in a St. Mary’s Academy uniform. Teague promptly launch an informal inquiry of his own, calling his daughter Anne, a teacher at St. Mary’s, hoping for information. Anne could only prepare him for a call from her principal…Teague’s old “friend” Sr. Alice-Marie, who called on behalf of her student’s family, out for blood.

Teague gave the news to Theodora after school, bringing her up to speed on the video and the fallout, admitting his own confusion that he hadn’t heard of it from Howard first.³

Appearance

Teague is a tall and powerfully built man, retaining his soldierly bearing in his middle age. He has brown eyes and black hair, which he usually keeps slicked back,⁴ and neatly trimmed facial hair.

Personality

Teague is a duty-driven man with immense moral principles and an ironclad resolve. He retains an absolute commitment to the running of his school, and views the protection of his students as his top priority. With his daughters grown, he lacks a personal life by his own choice, and is devoted to his work.

Despite a gruff, taciturn exterior, he retains a knife-sharp sense of gallows humor, and is thoroughly capable of enjoying himself, particularly when someone he doesn’t care for is getting the worst of things.

Origins and Development

Teague was created by TellatrixForever for the 2015 Season 1 AU. The germ of a principal character was sown prior to the game’s launch, when Tellatrix was workshopping ideas for what would become a major plotline in the game: his OC Amanda Steele being involved in some way with bringing down Queen Bee Nina Patterson. He had originally suggested Amanda would threaten to expose Nina’s behavior to Sheriff Hudson (also played by Tellatrix). This idea was shot down by forum moderator Celebrity01, who pointed out it would be better directed at someone within the school.

Tellatrix debuted Edward “Ed” Teague on September 10, 2015. He was the only recurring OC to appear in the forum without being preceded by an official application, leading to some confusion six days later, when ThePlotMurderer joined the forum and submitted an application for Theodora Kellerman, who was intended to be the principal. Learning that there already was such a role, Plot changed Theodora’s role to Vice Principal, Tellatrix subsequently submitting a bio for Teague to correct the confusion.

Tellatrix would bring Teague back for the May 2016 Season 2 AU, the October 2016 Season 3 AU and, ultimately, in 2019 for The Final Retreat. Since 2024, Teague has been portrayed by Snafu Guru, in The Final Retreat and Year One prequel.

Other Interpretations

Original OC Bio

The following is the application for the original Edward Teague, submitted by TellatrixForever on September 16, 2015. Text is presented as it was originally displayed on Fanfiction.net, with no redactions:

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Name: Edward Teague

Age: 43

Personality: Ed Teague is a true oddball. He does weird things, that nobody really understands, but accepts. But he’s a dangerous side to him. Not a man you want to mess with. Very effective at communication, and maintaining a working relationship with his students and staff. Can be very protective of them at times.

Appearance: Johnny Depp is his face claim. Always wears a tie and a suit jacket, but also wears tactical pants and combat boots.

Likes: Unknown.

Dislikes: Unknown.

Favorite Movie: Act of Valor.

Bio: Very little is known about Principal Teague or his past. What is known is that he was a Navy SEAL for a number of years before becoming Principal of George Washington High, and that he grew up in Lakewood.

Other: Teague is always armed, even on campus. And he also carries an air-horn everywhere he goes.

How far do you see them lasting: I really don’t know how long Mr. Teague is going to last.

Scream the TV Series

Obviously, Ed Teague does not originate in the television series. That isn’t to say GW High didn’t have a principal in the show. In the pilot episode, a woman speaks over the PA to inform students they are dismissed in the wake of Nina’s murder. Captions identify her as “Principal Showalter”. The character is never referenced again.

Season 1 AU

As originally conceived, Teague was a Navy SEAL veteran, not a Marine.⁵ His debut appearance, in which he abruptly hands new students Kieran and Deanna their schedules and sends them on their way, emphasizes an eccentric nature that, for the most part, would moderate in later incarnations of the character.⁶

He was originally a decade younger than Theodora. Notably, this wasn’t aligned with the age of his faceclaim, Johnny Depp, who is only a year younger than the Vice Principal.

Teague’s reputation for practically living at school dates from his earliest incarnation, the only one which never references his family.⁷ In his earliest scenes, particularly before the introduction of Theodora, Teague’s eccentricity is quite pronounced, with him notably initiating an awkward conversation with Seth Branson, only to abruptly leave with no explanation.⁸

Trivia

Teague was the 9th OC to be created for the Season 1 AU, though his bio was submitted six days after his debut.

Teague is one of the longest running original characters in the SRU, sharing the distinction with Deanna Wilcox and Theodora Kellerman, all of whom debuted in September 2015, for the Season 1 AU.

Teague is presumably named after Pirates of the Caribbean character Captain Edward Teague (Keith Richards), the father of Johnny Depp’s Captain Jack Sparrow. Depp was Teague’s original faceclaim.

Teague is one of several Season 1 AU OCs to have since been recast. He is, however, unique in being recast by his original creator. Contrast Derek Jackson, Colin Gable, and even canon character Tyler O’Neil.

Teague shares his faceclaim, Keanu Reeves, with his great-great grandfather, prison warden Buford Teague in Big Trouble in Little Lakewood: 1917.

Quotes

Welcome to fatherhood. There’s only so much you can control. Especially when they’re at the age of ‘reason’.

Teague offers Clark some parenting advice.

The kids are entitled to their privacy. God knows what they do with the damn thing turns my stomach more than I’d like, but you can’t go trampling over their right to it.

Teague prohibits Clark from searching students’ lockers without a warrant.

The sorry son of a son’s become a boogeyman. Something like this happens, it’s not surprising the kids will start drawing lines. But you don’t need me to tell you how our gang handles pattern recognition.

Teague tells Theodora he expects the local kids to draw parallels between the current crisis and the last one

It’s different with kids. Our kids, at least. They haven’t lived enough to know what they’re grieving, but they have to grieve anyway.

Teague, on grief

I didn’t spend my glorious youth taking potshots at Saddam’s sand sweepers so any yacko with a badge can treat a public high school like the Wild West.

Teague opposes Clark’s overreach

Gallery

1. The Story so Far, Vol. I: Chapter 1, Scene 26 ↩︎
2. The Story so Far, Vol. I: Chapter 1, Scene 19 ↩︎
3. The Story so Far, Vol. I: Chapter 1, Scene 26 ↩︎
4. The Story so Far, Vol. I: Chapter 1, Scene 19 ↩︎
5. Season 1 AU: Pilot, Post 123 ↩︎
6. Season 1 AU: Pilot, Post 125 ↩︎
7. Season 1 AU: Pilot, Post 165 ↩︎
8. Season 1 AU: Pilot, Post 177 ↩︎